Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Link up, link back, say hey!

1. No matter how many stacks of papers I have (a lot), it's still always great to finish a pile and put them in the grade book.

2. I'm reading History of Wolves by Emily Fridlund right now and it's really disturbing me. It's good, definitely, but she alludes to something happening to a young boy at the beginning so I'm just on pins and needles for this bad thing to happen. Since I've become a mom I have a really hard time with this sort of thing, but I'm sucking it up for the writing.

3. Joe Biden's new memoir, Promise Me, Dad and Andy Weir's Artemis both came in the mail for me yesterday. I think this will conclude the book buying until after the holidays. 

4. Starting on Saturday I have things going for nearly a weeks straight, but I am SO excited, since it's all fun stuff (I have next week off for our Thanksgiving break). I'm running a 5k at UCLA, I'm taking Sawyer to Knott's for a few hours (we have super cheap annual passes, so I can do that now and not feel bad), I'm getting my hair done, I have plans to see friends, and hopefully some reading, running and relaxation. I just have to get through the next few days at work.

5. I think the site Cupcakes and Cashmere is a little fluffy, so reading her blog is definitely a guilty pleasure. She did post something timely for me last week, though, about remembering that a lot of the time when people act negatively towards you it really is a problem on their end. So, basically, yes, people may hurt your feelings but often it's because they're having a rough time, are insecure, or thrive on negativity. Obviously that's not always true, since we all deserve attitude from others on occasion. But recently someone I care about greatly has been a little judgmental towards me and I've remembered to pause and look at things from a different perspective. 

6. So, it has to happen- we're getting more crappy Ikea bookshelves. We have several tall Billy book cases with shelf extenders in our great room, but we've outgrown them. We want to do custom shelving, but that is probably after a year or two of saving for the Big Remodel. For now I'm going to get a few small white units for our dining room, which means I get to reorganize. 

7. I made this pumpkin cake, minus the toppings, and layer instead of sheet, last weekend and it is so good! It's basically pumpkin bread in cake form with an extremely delicious.

8. One of Sawyer's teachers is leaving next week and I am so bummed. She is the lead teacher for his room (the other two teachers are great, though) and has been such a huge help transitioning him there. I know this is part of the process, but I still was sad when I head the news. 

The Pros and Cons of NaNoWriMo

As most of you probably know, November is National Novel Writing Month, better known as NaNoWriMo. If you choose to actually participate in “the movement,” you pledge to write 50,000 words by the end of the month, which equates to about 1,666 words a day. Five or so years ago I decided to do this, and was successful at meeting the final word count with a day or so to spare, no easy feat considering I was working full time and hosting Thanksgiving. Every year during this time I reflect on the experience with mixed feelings. On one hand, I’m glad I did it. On another, it was actually kind of a huge waste.


A friend of mine at work participated at the same time, so it was a fun experience comparing numbers and lamenting together.

I always enjoy a project.

I loved the graph features of the website- I’m driven by numbers and progress, so it was really motivating to log on and see where I was every day.

It was a good writing exercise- there is something to be said for being able to produce under pressure.

Bragging rights!


NaNoWriMo is really about quantity, not quality.

Somewhere around day 15 or 20 the goal became a massive chore, which took away from the initial fun and passion.

Because of the time and word count the process never felt organic. If you lag one day you have to make it up later.

There really isn’t time to revise, at all, which for many people is part of their natural writing process.

Novels are generally more than 50,000 words, so if you really want to write a book and try to publish it, this would be an awkward amount to stop at (not really a novella, but not a novel either).

I am actually quite embarrassed about what I wrote, which seems like a pretty pathetic end to a month of hard work.

Personally, I'll never do it again and the whole thing sort of left a bad taste in my mouth. Anyone else try it? Thoughts?

Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Link up, link back, say hey!

1. I finally got all the nonsense surrounding my small car accident taken care of- DMV paperwork sent, car dropped off at body shop, rental picked up, and statements give to both insurance companies. Adulting is such a pain.

2. I wrote a post yesterday about my reading since the election. Here it is in case you missed it.

3. Not only is Friday a day off, but it's also the day Taylor Swift's new album comes out. Stop judging me, thanks. I'm in the car for over 90 minutes a day and need new music. 

4. I'm getting a little desperate with Sawyer's up 2-4 times a night sleeping schedule (sometimes it's to go to the bathroom, sometimes he just wants to get up for the day, sometimes he just needs to be redirected back to bed, sometimes he has nightmares; we don't let him sleep with us and he's not throwing fits, so it's just all really frustrating and exhausting). I ordered a new nightlight, started infusing lavender oil last night, and am going to start him on an ounce or two of tart cherry juice this weekend. If none of this works I may have to ask the doctor about baby melatonin (I am very, very hesitant to do this, though, but I am not opposed to just talking to the doctor about it). This has been going on for over a year and it's tough (mostly for me).

5. My students just turned in a huge stack of "future memoirs" they wrote after reading Michael Ondaatje's and I am actually excited to read them! Using his as a model, they had to write seven pages of text and then use two other mediums for three more pages (photography, maps, song lyrics, etc...), discussing a trip home twenty years in the future. They had to have some sort of purpose (reconciling with a family member, a reunion, personal growth, etc...), so it was really more of a creative assignment than anything. Several of them admitted that they really enjoyed the assignment after so much whining, which is always a win as a teacher. Now I just have to get through some of their regular essays first. 

6. I'm still plugging away at Jeffrey Eugenide's short story collection and I really like it. I just haven't had much time to read this week, but hopefully I can finish it up this weekend.

7. My son just got mad at me for something and told me to "go to Target." Like that's a punishment? 

How the 2016 Election Has Impacted My Reading

Tomorrow marks the one year anniversary of that one time America voted Hillary Clinton as President. Unfortunately, the Electoral College did not, so today our already conflicted country is now run by a man who has no real interest in maintaining or promoting peace, social justice, human rights, environmental stability, health, or really anything else positive and fair. The night of the 2016 election I remember a feeling of numb disbelief as I sat on the floor and ate Halloween candy with a side of wine for dinner. I was scared and pessimistic, and I still am today. This country is on the verge of collapse on so many levels that I can’t help but to constantly question how Hillary Clinton possibly could have done a worse job.

Relatively soon after the loss I took stock of what I could personally do to back up my vote. I started donating more money when I could to causes I knew would feel the brunt of budget constraints (Planned Parenthood, The Sierra Club, and the ACLU). I have contacted representatives over the issues I am most concerned about (it’s so easy with email, guys!) and I give my students opportunities to reflect about causes that impact their world (DACA, fears regarding shootings, etc…).

This last year has greatly impacted my reading, as well. I have made a significant effort to better educate myself on issues that I may not have first-hand knowledge of or need to understand better. I also bought my three-year-old son a slew of books as a starting point to talk about concepts such as gay marriage, poverty, racial differences, and gender equality. Reading and books have always been what I turn to in times of stress and when I need to learn, and the last year has been no different. Because of this I have seen a bit of a change in my reading and purchasing habits and I thought I’d share some that have helped me better cope and, more importantly, understand.

Hillbilly Elegy by JD Vance
I read this book immediately after the election to try to wrap my head around the mentality of those in states who voted Republican. Vance offers a unique perspective as someone who was able to make it out of the extreme poverty of the region and obtain an advanced education. I don’t think anything in this book necessarily was incredibly new, but seeing it spelled out in front of me last November was helpful.  I finished the book feeling depressed and angry, but I did have a better understanding of why some people voted the way they did.

How to Win at Feminism by The Reductress
Dear Ijeawele, or A Feminist Manifesto in Fifteen Suggestions by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
As a woman and a feminist I don’t think I have ever felt in my lifetime that the progress of our sex is in as much jeopardy as it is today, whether it’s because of an attack on the right to make decisions about our own bodies, access to affordable birth control, or the way the president has treated women in the past.

Exit West by Mohsin Hamid
This is beautifully written novella that describes the journey of a young refugee couple from, presumably, Syria who face extreme difficulty while trying to simply work for a better, safer life. The magical realism adds an additional element that enriches their story, as does the complex relationships Hamid creates. We see the horrific pictures on the news of refugee boats capsizing and countries refusing to help, but it’s so easy to click to a new site or change this page. This book resonates longer and humanizes the crisis even more.

Persepolis by Marjane Satrapi
I confess, I have been a total slacker when it comes to taking the time to really understand the Israeli/Palestine conflict. In an effort to better understand more than just the basics, and to read more graphic novels, this book was a really interesting starting point.

Home Fire by Kamila Shamsie
One of my favorite books of the year, Shamsie retells Antigone using ISIS and the public’s perception of Muslims. The story begins with the protagonist at an airport carefully answering security questions so that she will be permitted into the United States to further her education- she knows how meticulously she is being scrutinized and that many may judge her for wearing a Hijab. Differing opinions regarding cultural assimilation end up being at the forefront as well, straining familial and potentially romantic relationships. Shamsie’s usage of the underlying themes and issues in Antigone, in combination with more timely issues proves to be close to perfection.

The Hate You Give by Angie Thomas
I am definitely not a YA reader, but I had some serious FOMO when it came to this book, and I had a hunch that it was important. I was right- every white person needs to read this book, like, yesterday. Centering around police brutality/shootings, this novel deals with the complexity of race in America and how we need to be better. I will never understand what it means to be and African American, just as a man will never understand what it means to be a woman, but I can listen, ask questions, and be an ally when/if needed. Next semester my students have to read an outside reading book dealing with social issues, and I will definitely let them read this one (with parental permission, of course).

What Happened by Hillary Rodham Clinton
This was a much  more interesting read than I thought it was going to be- I was worried it may become bogged down with political jargon, long-winded excuses, and rants. Sure, there was a little bit of that, but I thought as a whole it was a really thoughtful reflection of what happened before, during, and after the election. I’ll never say Clinton is perfect, but I still stand by my opinion that she was the best choice last year.

Evicted by Matthew Desmond
We read this for book club last month and I learned a lot about the eviction process and issues with housing in America (this book was set in Wisconsin). It is so, so hard to get out of the cycle of poverty and eviction, and there are so many people out there ready to take advantage of those caught up in it (or just ignore them completely). What struck me is how tough it is for the kids- when moving from place to place and watching one’s parents struggle so hard, it’s incredibly challenging to know how to do differently as an adult. It’s heartbreaking.  With gentrification, the widening of the class divide, and the ineffectiveness of the government, help doesn’t seem to be anywhere in sight.

Who Thought This Was a Good Idea? By Alyssa Mastromonaco
I listened to this book over the summer and adored every minute. Mastromonaco was Obama’s Chief of Staff and it was fascinating hearing about her experiences in the White House. She’s funny, smart, and the professional, diverse, fair environment of the White House she discusses seems starkly different to what it seems to be now. It made me miss Obama even more than I already did.

Purchased (but not read yet):

The New Jim Crow: Mass Incarceration in the Age of Colorblindness by Michelle Alexander
I purchased this when the “taking a knee” controversy started at football games, even though I had meant to pick it up months ago.

The Accusation by Bandi
North Korea is the enemy, but what about the actual people who live there? I know so little.

This is by no means a comprehensive list of what all was published last year on the social, political, or cultural level. I also didn’t limit myself to books just in line with these is

Lessons from Last Week

Car insurance is so important/if no one gets hurt you win
I was in a decent-sized fender bender with Sawyer on Thursday and while both cars got banged up, and the other driver is trying to place blame on me (I'm not going to get into it right here, right now), everyone was completely fine and both cars were drivable. Even if I have to eat my deductible, it's still so much better than the alternative. And again, everyone was safe. I saw two horrible accidents within twenty-four hours after and I just can't stop feeling thankful (and being really, really, really careful when driving). 

Don't Wear Tight Pants
I wore extremely tight fake leather pants as part of my costume on Halloween (I was Batman) and ended up with extreme stomach pains and accompanying issues for the rest of the night, to the point where I told my husband that if Sawyer wasn't sleeping I would have had him take me to urgent care, I so miserable. I was totally fine otherwise and hadn't eaten anything weird. Mama just can't hang. 

Just Take the Cold Medicine
Christine, you already dealt with an upset stomach, don't be martyr. Just take the DayQuil (I did, although I was fine the next day, so I'm not sure what the problem was). 

Don't Google Your Child's Health Concerns
So, without going into too much detail, Sawyer had a GI issue earlier this week and I knew immediately without the internet that I needed to run it by the doctor asap, but couldn't get in until Thursday, leaving my over two days to ruminate. My fear and stress got the better of me and I started poking around online and my concerns were confirmed. Luckily, after seeing the doctor he felt that the fact the symptom was presenting in isolation meant it was most likely a fluke, although he sent us for blood work and an ultrasound to be safe. I have to say my kid is a champ- he didn't cry at all during the lab work and he was so chill while getting his ultrasound he fell asleep! My gut (ha. ha. ha) is telling me that things are probably fine, but I will be thankful to get the test results later this week. He's my best buddy and the mere notion that something is wrong makes me feel as sick as I did when wearing tight pants. 

Promise Your Students
I swore that I'd have all of their reading quizzes graded and put in the grade book by Monday and that sense of obligation pushed me to get that stack done this weekend (that stack... there are many more stacks at work). So, spending many hours grading this weekend wasn't fantastic, but it'll be nice to be able to check to so many assignments off my grading calendar tomorrow morning. I really, really try to be honest and straightforward with my students at all times, so it was important to me that I hold up my part of the bargain. 

Take a Minute
Obviously, last week was pretty crappy. Everything was manageable, but two bouts of sickness, a potentially stressful health issue for my son, and a small car accident all in one week was a lot for me all at once. Yesterday my husband had plans all day, so instead of working through Sawyer's nap time like I normally do, I said screw it, watched This is Us and cross stitched for an hour and a half. It felt gluttonous and was what I needed.  

Your Kid Will Never Sleep In, Ever, Not Even For a Sleeping Holiday 
Nope, there was no extra hour of sleep for last night's sleeping holiday (come one, that's really what it is). I knew that was going to happen, but the 4:45 wake up this morning was still sad. I made the best of it, though, taking Sawyer to get pancakes before 7 and to walk around the duck pond before 8. My kid chooses not to observe the WONDERFUL HOLIDAY that is the End of Daylight Savings, but that is his ethical, moral, and personal choice. I have to respect it. 

Sometimes You Have to Be An Adult
Because of the unexpected expenses of at least putting up the initial costs for car rental and my insurance deductible, I made the call to cancel my quick little weekend trip up the coast alone to be fiscally responsible. It stung, a lot (there may have been a tear or two), but I knew in the end the added expense would be more stressful so I pulled the plug. There will be other chances. 

Remember the Good
There were some good moments this week- Halloween, pre-stomach disaster, was so fun this year! Sawyer had a costume parade on Friday too, at his school, that was the absolute cutest. I've also been loving Jeffrey Eugenides' newest short story collection and am excited about an unrelated blog post I'm working on for this week. I got in two short runs this weekend, taking it easy after not feeling well this week, and a few walks too. I was able to touch bases in various forms with several friends over the past few days, and of right now I'm winning my week for Fantasy Football. It's not all bad. 

Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Link up, link back, say hey!

1. Due to some minor stomach issues, I had to avoid coffee and Diet Coke today. I am completely miserable, and I don't care what that says about me- my drug of choice is completely approved by the FDA, thanks. My head doesn't hurt at all, surprisingly, but I have unintentionally nodded off twice today (not while driving or with students in my classroom, don't worry). Tomorrow I should be back on the sauce. 

2. Halloween was a success! Sawyer was a shark, I was Batman, and my husband was the Daddy Who Got Home in Time to Go Trick-or-Treating this Year. We went with the neighbors and the kids go way too much candy. Luckily my stomach is feeling better and I can start implementing the Mom Tax (hopefully the Republicans don't take that away). 

3. Go buy Everything but the Bagel seasoning from Trader Joe's right now, then put it on basically everything. 

4. I think I found a new band to love: Portugal. The Man. I'm still undecided, but they're growing on me.

5. Last Saturday I went hiking with my friend on a trail that runs a five mile loop in the hills of Claremont. I love exercising with friends- you can catch up while getting a work out. I ran seven miles the next day and by Monday my legs were total toast. 

6. I just started Jeffrey Eugenides' newest book of short stories and so far, so good. I might read The New Jim Crow concurrently, but we'll see.

7. It's November! My favorite month- the weather is cooler, we get a day off for Veteran's Day, I get to go away for a weekend alone, we have our anniversary, I get a week off (while Sawyer's preschool is still open so I can take him part of the time), and there's all the fun of cooking a Thanksgiving feast. November is where it's at. 

October Reviews

Happy Halloween! I’m off to dress up like Batman (seriously) and take my little shark trick-or-treating soon, but here’s a quick rundown on what I read this month:

Evicted by Matthew Desmond
448 pages
This book chronicles the lives of several families, most of which are African Americans, living in poverty in Milwaukee and constantly facing the threat of being evicted. Desmond provides a look at the psychological, economical, and sociological factors behind their situations, showing readers how hard it is to break the cycle of the housing crisis. Once evicted, it’s difficult to find a new place. When homeless it’s difficult to find a job. When you are completely broke and without a home for you and your family it’s hard to be happy, resist vices and temptation, and thrive.

Verdict: This was one of those books that was difficult and depressing, but also important. I firmly believe in personal responsibility, but how can we as a society expect people who have absolutely no opportunities to even survive? And what about if that’s all you’ve ever known your whole life? We need to do better.

Running in the Family by Michael Ondaatje
203 pages
This is my third time reading this book, since I teach it to my IB seniors every other year. The memoir tells the tale of Ondaatje’s return home to Sri Lanka to learn about his family and find some closure. The memoir is uniquely constructed with photographs, poems, notebook/diary entries, and maps

Verdict: I enjoy this book more each time I read it, and  because of this I think the kids are more and more receptive to it every year (funny how that works, huh?). I appreciate Ondaatje’s prose, but also at the different components that fit together to offer different perspectives of his journey home.

Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng
336 pages
Ng’s second novel looks at two different families living in Shaker Heights, a town that tries so very hard to be perfect. On one hand, we have the Richardsons, full of bright, well-adjusted, upper-middle-class, entitled people (minus one of the daughters, who we learn starts her family’s home on fire within the first few pages). The other family, the Warrens, is made up of just Mia and her daughter, Pearl (go ahead and start reading into the Scarlet Letter symbolism now), two vagabonds who bounce from town to town however Mia, an artist, sees fit. Mia rents a home from the Richardsons and their connection commences, becoming increasingly murky as Pearl becomes involved with the Richardson children and both families become embroiled in an adoption scandal that rocks the town.

Verdict: I have to admit to liking her first book better, but this one was still really intriguing and solid, in terms of writing and character depth. I still struggle a tiny bit at sort of the dated quality of the adoption angle, as it is a little reminiscent of a 1996ish made-for-TV movie of the week (although this is when it’s set, so I’ll give Ng that). It’s definitely a book I’ll buy a person or two for Christmas and one I’ll recommend to my students.

Roar by Stacy Sims
304 pages
This is an interesting look at female physiology, including body composition, diet, exercise, and metabolic processes. Sims offers suggestions on fueling, activity plans, and hydration needs for those who are serious about being active to those who are more in line with competitive endurance events.

Verdict: I saw a running blogger reading this and thought it looked interesting. I am extremely active, but I know that I don’t always fuel myself correctly and am horrible at managing my hydration needs. It was interesting on the scientific and practical levels, although definitely not for everyone (though it is incredibly accessible).

1,291 pages 

I Need to Think New Thoughts

I’ve always loved to travel, and while I have never been a globetrotter by any means, I’ve gone some pretty great places: Italy, the Caribbean, Mexico a few times, NYC, Hawaii, Minnesota (via a road trip that spanned eight or nine states), Arizona, Texas, Florida, and lots of places in Nevada and here in California. We couldn’t afford extensive travel  as a kid, so as an adult it’s been something that I’ve always enjoyed having the option to do, even when I have not taken advantage of it. Unfortunately, since having Sawyer, my travel has been limited to California and the itch to go somewhere new has been increasing. Why I didn’t jump on more planes for weekend trips before him is beyond me.

Meanwhile, in the midst of this wanderlust, I listened to Kristin Newman’s What I Was Doing While You Were Breeding, a travel memoir of her single life gallivanting around the world, exploring new places whenever there was a break in her TV-writing schedule. Near the end, she said something that strongly resonated with me, so much more than the fun stories of her flings and shenanigans. She talked about one of the reasons why travel has been so important to her is because she believes that we humans think about twenty thoughts, just in different combinations and with slight variations. When we travel, though, we are forced to ”think new thoughts.” And there it was. That, right there, completely explained why I need to get out of my comfort zone a bit: I need to think new thoughts.

The thoughts I currently think aren’t all  bad, but sometimes even the chocolate ganache or Hawaiian pizza gets old (two of my favorite foods, thanks for asking).  So, yes, while I love my son, husband, our home, my job, running, and making plans for the weekend, things can still get old. And the things I think about that are less enjoyable, like all the papers I need to grade, the chores at home that are undone, wanting to pay off student loans, politics, my loop of perpetual exhaustion, and those other unpleasant thoughts one can have, get even more mundane.  I’m also the type of person who thinks nonstop, 110% of the time. Apparently there are people that can zone out? I can’t even fathom the notion.

I need to think new thoughts.

My son is finally at the age, three and a half, where I feel comfortable going on a long trip alone with him by myself. He can happily wheel his own suitcase in an airport, responds to directions fairly well, is out of diapers, and is incredibly flexible. I’m not super psyched about the prospect of the car seat in an airport an rental car situation alone, but I can manage (my husband’s work schedule makes it hard for him to get away with us).  I’ve decided we are going to head to Banff National Park in July- my personal deadline is booking the hotel part of the trip by this Friday.

I need to spend some time alone, too. Before having my son I spent a few hours every afternoon alone after work and before Scott came home. I wouldn’t trade Sawyer for that time, of course, but the last few months have felt like a whirlwind of everyone needing me, all the time, and I have had some serious moments of real struggle. Between work and home I am “on duty” for about  fifteen or sixteeen hours straight every day and I need to breathe, alone, without people asking me seventeen things at once. Yes, I am alone responsible for my life and how I live it. I know. I promise I'm not trying to pass the buck. We recently finished Michael Ondaatje’s Running in the Family at school and his grandmother, Lala, says to have minimized physical contact with her grandchildren because she felt like her space was so constantly invaded. I don’t necessarily feel that on a physical level, but mentally and emotionally sometimes I do. I know some people who prefer being surrounded by people all day every day and some who would prefer total isolation, classic introvert vs extrovert mentalities. I guess I’m somewhere in between?  Anyway, in a few weeks, I am going away for a day and a half alone, up the coast (in the interest of full disclosure, part of the reason I am going is also because I need a night of uninterrupted blissful hotel sleep, too).

I need to think new thoughts.

I think part of the reason I’ve always been so drawn to reading is because it often is a wonderful substitute for travel- it too allows you to think new things, based on setting character interactions, controversy, and even writing style. Five Days at Memorial forced me to consider ethical questions that made my uncomfortable, dystopian literature makes me think about how horribly I’d do under apocalyptic circumstances, Crazy Rich Asians allowed me to pretend to be incredibly wealthy, and so on and so forth.

Whether you like to travel or not, I think it’s important that we all take Newman’s advice to some degree and figure out how to “think new thoughts.” Get off the hamster wheel, hit reset, and be willing to branch out. It’ll be good. I promise.

Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Link up, link back, say hey!

1. I think the fact that I think a hashtag demeans things is a sign of my age. It's not going anywhere and can be a powerful tool, but I just can't help thinking that once something becomes one it's level of seriousness is just diminished a tiny bit. 

2. I've been running a lot lately! Sunday was my farthest run in a few years- seven miles. ALL ON THE TREADMILL. Seven miles at a time on my best friend is a little rough, and it took some serious mental willpower to get through. But, I think that's actually what I love about training indoors- the mental stamina developed proves to be essential on race day. 

3. I need to start fueling my body better- I eat well up until I get home for the day (example: my lunch every day is a veggie patty, string cheese, and an apple, but when I get home there's at least one or two handfuls of peanut butter M&Ms happening). I am extremely tired to begin with and I know my diet isn't helping. I'm not going to try a massive overhaul, but I just got a copy of ROAR by Stacy Sims for some tips. 

4. I'm also finishing up Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng and after I got over the "1995 TV movie of the week adoption" component I settled in to love it. 

5. Today is Sawyer's half birthday, and while I didn't even tell him that was the case as to not confuse him, I had to reflect a little on social media. I love having a three-year-old! It is  such a fun age and I've loved watching him develop so much lately. His vocabulary and speech development has grown by leaps and bounds since going to preschool, he's potty trained, he pretends constantly, and he's always excited to go new places and try new things. Perfect he is not- he still wakes up once or twice a night calling for me for various reasons, he gets incredibly frustrated if I can't understand what he's saying, and he is still relatively picky (all normal, except maybe the sleeping part... wahhhhh). He's the best.

6. I feel like this weekend begins the holiday season, which I'm excited for. Friday night we have a Trunk or Treat at Sawyer's school, Saturday I'm hiking with a friend, Sunday morning I'm meeting up with a friend and her kids, and I'd also like to do some baking and pumpkin carving. Then it's Halloween next week (I'm dressing up! Ha!).

7. What I want to bake: Pumpkin Sheet Cake with Brown Butter Frosting. I also promised Sawyer we'd make some Halloween cookies, but I'd also like to do make croissants soon while I still remember what I learned from my class. I can't do it all! OR CAN I?

8. There are only two shows that I can say I am watching right now: The Good Place (with) and This is Us (without). We were watching Fargo, too, but that has to be put on hold because I can seriously only get through an hour or two a week. The good news is that both shows are both quite entertaining and enjoyable.

9. I just realized the Ready Player One movie was pushed back until spring of 2019, as it was slated to open agains the new Star Wars movie. Probably a good move. 

10. Last weekend Sawyer and I went to Temecula to a huge corn maze and a pumpkin patch. After an hour I had to use an emergency exit on the maze because we were very, very lost with no sign of an end (with increasing temperatures). We walked nearly three miles! Despite our failure it was still very fun and the corn reminded me of growing up in the Central Valley.

The Longest Week: Teacher Snapshots

[Fact: essays breed like rabbits] 

For some reason parent-teacher conference week is always insane. I don't feel obligated to have everything graded (I am not a magician), as I always have plenty of grades in my grade book to show how my kids are doing (as of right now, for about ten weeks of school, I have thirty in for each kid). It usually ends up that we're finishing one book and starting another, so the onslaught of end-of-the-book essays, tests, and assignments is ridiculous. At the same time I'm also prepping to start a new work, so the workload intensifies. We always have book club the day of conferences, since we can actually go out to lunch (typically we get just thirty-five minutes, which makes leaving campus is impossible), so I'm usually rushing to finish the book up to, and this week was no exception. 

I think there are many, many people out there that simply don't realize what it takes to be a teacher (although there are plenty who do). While we're at work our mental and emotional capacities are stretched so thin, needing to tend to several things and people at once from the moment we get there to the moment we can get out the door. While we're at home we have our own lives, but we also have to wrestle with the silent expectations that we will get done everything we didn't get to while actually at work. My contractual day is 7.5 hours, but I put in many, many more hours than that, on the low end eight extra, on a harder week nearly twenty (as do all of my colleagues). I'm not trying to complain, because I really do love my job and would walk on fire for my students. But the idea that it's all summer vacations, leisurely afternoons at home before those with 9-5s, and that we can "just give them all Bs" is just so totally wrong and frustrating. 

Motivated by some contractual issues we have right now with our union and district, and by my own love of seeing the daily lives of others, I decided to take some really boring, but really accurate pictures of what a crazy week looks like for an English teacher. 

[I start every single morning with a to-do list]

[that new Keurig is hard hard at work]

[afternoon meeting on things I already know]

[re-doing bulletin boards]

[when I swear at work]

[every single night for the past 10 or so days]

[it's always nice to meet with families, as much
as the lead up can be rough]

[trying to get it allll done before Thanksgiving break]

[we get to leave 2.5 hours early the day after
conferences so I took myself to lunch]

Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

Link up! Link back!

It's parent-teacher conference eve, which means my evening is spent frantically getting my grade book in order, finishing the book club book for our meeting tomorrow (I do this basically EVERY time, I'm as bad as my students!), and trying to get in a stress-relieving run. Please feel free to link up below and enjoy everyone else's posts (which are always so great, but I suck at life and always read them on my phone, which for some reason makes commenting hard). 

The Reading Situation

What I'm Currently Reading:
Evicted by Matthew Desmond- This is for book club and while it's really important and infuriating, it's also really depressing, which isn't doing anything for my mood.

So many papers- This is typically one of the craziest weeks of the year for me; parent-teacher conferences always coincides with the ending of a work-of-study (this time Macbeth), so I'm buried. Imagine someone (me), being buried in the sand up to their nose, but pretend the sand is now essays and assignments. 

Halloween children's books- Sawyer has a few that he loves and he's super pumped to trick-or-treat this year, so we've been reading them quite frequently.

Articles on how much water sprinklers use- Fun story: I received my water bill today and it had gone up a lot. I panicked, thinking that we have a leak somewhere slowly destroying our foundation or inner walls. THERE GOES MY TRAVEL FUND. I then remembered we have had some sprinkler repairs, so I got swallowed by landscaping articles. An hour or two later my husband came home and reminded me we had increased our outdoor watering by two days a week. And there you have it. 

What I Actually Want to Be Reading:

Banff, Jasper & Glacier National Parks Lonely Planet Guide- I want to reserve the hotels for next summer in the next week. I need to plan and overwhelm myself with information! 

Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng- I read about thirty pages of this and then put it on the back burner for everything else. It was such a tease.

Recent Acquisitions

The Accusation by Bandi- Stories out of North Korea

The New Jim Crow by Michelle Alexander- Clearly the political and social climate of the country and world are influencing my reading. 


You Are Not  a Stranger Here by Adam Haslett- This collection of short stories is quite old, but I had no idea he had written so much else!

Good Without God by Greg Epstein- Religion is hard. 

Sing, Unburied, Sing by Jesmyn Ward- All the cool kids are doing it.

Bookish (and not so Bookish) Thoughts

[spotted on the way to preschool]

Link up, link back, say hey!

Ten things I've done lately:

1. Went to Knott's Berry Farm with Sawyer and Scott over the weekend. It had been a decade since I'd gone and it was Sawyer's first time- we had a blast! Tickets are cheap if you buy them online and then for like ten bucks more than a regular gate ticket you can upgrade to an annual pass, so I did. The park is so much more affordable and less busy that Disneyland, so it will be fun option for Sawyer and I. 

[confession: I ate an entire boysenberry funnel cake at Knott's]

2. Bite my tongue, many, many times. Sometimes this is good, but sometimes I think I let people get away with things. 

3. Take Sawyer out cruising on his scooter. He's getting good! 

4. Have bad dreams. The other night I dreamt that I was late to a morning meeting and when I got to preschool to drop Sawyer off I realized I had left him upstairs with Scott and was two hours late to something important. 

5. Decide to take the plunge and book the lodging for our summer vacation. I hope to do it in the next few days and will do the flights later (we are going to Banff in Canada!). I always have a reason to possibly put off a large trip (intimidated by schlepping around a car seat alone in an airport, my financial conservatism, etc...). I need something super awesome to look forward to. Plus the idea of getting my three-year-old a passport is equal parts awesome and weird to me (I got my first one when I was in my mid-twenties!). 

6. Cancel my tickets to the Jennifer Egan reading next week, since it's on parent-teacher conference night. Womp womp womp.

7. Run and run and run. I have a 10k on Sunday and while I don't have major hopes of doing amazing, I am fairly confident I will manage okay for where I am at right now. The biggest issue I am having right now is the fact that while this hobby makes me feel fit and less stressed, it also makes me more tired than I already am.

8. Make very slow process on reading Evicted for book club next week. 

9. Bought a new comforter for the guest bedroom- my mom is coming in to town next weekend and my mother-in-law the weekend after (Sawyer will be in heaven! So many grandmas!). Guess where the comforter is? In the bags, on the floor, because there's so much crap on the actual bed. Sigh. 

10. Worry about the fires. The Canyon 2 fire is about thirty minutes away from us, so while we aren't at risk it's been so upsetting seeing people so close lose their homes and not be able to get past evacuation boundaries. The fires upstate are far, far worse and even more devastating. I think the common perception was that California would have an easier fire season because we had so much rain last winter. In reality, the rain catalyzed a ton of growth, when then naturally dried out during the hot summer. And here we are.